Thinking about Alice.

** “Whatever Happened to Alice Monroe?” is a work of fiction hosted by Verb Theatre's BLUE LIGHT Festival 2020. To start from the beginning, go to www.verbtheatre.com/alicemonroestart  **

Posted May 5, 2019

There are a million theories floating around the internet about what happened to Alice, but it feels like everyone is jumping to some really insane conclusions (aliens? really?) and I don’t know why but it’s making me really sad and anxious.

I guess I’m just feeling like a lot of the people posting theories about her being a lizard person or an AI or whatever are men who don’t really understand what it’s like to exist as a woman. In the world in general, but especially on the internet. There were so many awful, awful responses online when she posted about being stalked, or having her house broken into. A LOT of guys telling her she was crazy, or saying she made it up for attention (as if she didn’t already have way more of that than she wanted.)

It took me about 3 minutes of googling to find out that on average, over 3 women a day are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends. Women are 86% of victims of abuse at the hands of a non-spouse partner. 

She didn’t talk about her love life a lot online, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t have one. She could have easily had an abusive partner that she kept secret. Most women DO keep it secret when they’re abused, out of fear of retribution, or a misplaced sense of shame, or because they think it will never happen again. 

In the last year before she disappeared, I noticed some bruises on a few Instagram photos. I think she must have realized they were there, taken them down, and then re-uploaded them with the bruises edited out, because the first time I went back to double check, the bruise was gone. This happened a few times, and I thought I was just imagining things, but eventually I started screenshotting them as soon as I saw them just to know I wasn’t going crazy.

Sometimes it isn’t the craziest explanation. Sometimes we have to face the facts and realize that the world we live in is incredibly dangerous for women, especially when they become high profile.

I’m not going to claim that I know what happened to her. It’s very possible she was killed by a partner, that she was being abused for months or years and none of us knew about it (as Alice tried to remind people via Twitter for the last couple of years - following someone online isn’t the same as knowing them). Maybe she got out of a bad relationship and went underground for her own safety. Maybe she’s even in Witness Protection.

I do think that she was really unhappy the last few years. Her twitter feed made that pretty obvious. And I wish we lived in a world that would have taken that seriously before she went missing. 

If anyone needs to talk, my inbox is open. If you’re in a dangerous situation, you can call the National Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). If you’re in Denver, safehouse-denver.org/ is a great resource.

Stay safe out there, everyone.